Facebook For wizards
by Seraphim Faust
Summary: Facebook-for wizards with added humour and romance...
1. Chapter 1

Hello! i'm a bit bored and this came out as a result.

Disclaimer: i don't own harry potter or facebook!

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><p><span>Facebook- wizardy style...<span>

**Draco Lucius Malfoy **is dating the one.

4 people likes this

comments:

**Ron Weasley:** yeah, sure, like anyone wants to go out with you...

**Draco Lucius Malfoy:** They do actually. unlike _you._

**Pansy Petunia Parkinson: **What? Who do i have to kill?

**Ron Weasley: **Lol. i bet you it's Bulstrode.

**Millicent Millie Bulstrode: **It's not me dimwit.

**Harry James Potter: **Bonjour Mon cher.

**Millicent Millie Bulstrode: **Oh my god! Pansy fainted! what did you do Potter?

**Millicent Millie Bulstrode: **Oh shite. Never mind Pansy just told me.

**Ron weasley: **hiya, mate. what did you say in... is that french? when did you start talking in french?

**Harry James Potter: **-laughs nervously- when i started dating...

**Ron weasley: **who?

**Hermione Granger: **Draco Malfoy, obviously. didn't you read the comment, you know the one in french? it says hello my d- oh my god! Ron? Ron? Ron?

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><p>And the rest is left to your imagination...<p>

i might post some more up if i'm tking a break from summer lover or when i'm bored.

I'd appreciate reviews. tell me wht you think. it's just experimental. if no one seems to like it, i'll delete it.

thanks,

Faith hf and l


	2. Chapter 2

well here is anotehr one.

i hope you like it

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><p><span>Facebook- wizardry style…<span>

**Albus Wulfric Dumbledore: **Half-Blood Prince… Infiltrate the foe's inner circle…

One person likes this

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><p><strong>Lord Voldemort:<strong>I'll be home soon, my beloved snake…

Twelve people like this

Comments:

**Bellatrix Lestrange:** Why do you say that? My lord?

**Lord Voldemort:** What do you mean? Are you questioning me? Do you want your ass crucio'd?

**Bellatrix Lestrange:** I mean no disrespect, my lord. I just meant that Nagini cannot type so…

**Lord Voldemort:** -sneers- It is not Nagini. It is my beloved fiancée

**Lucius Malfoy:** Who is it, My lord? I would like to congratulate both of you.

**Bellatrix Lestrange:** Yes, do tell. Who's ass do I have to avada kedavra?

**Severus Snape:** It's roast for tonight darli- Oh, hello…-sneers-

**Lord Voldemort:** I'll be there soon, I just have to finish marking a few servants.

**Narcissa Malfoy:** Bellatrix? Bella? Tri? Lucius! Log out and help me with bella! She fainted! And she's getting blood on my skirt.

**Severus Snape:** I'll be waiting…

**Albus Wulfric Dumbledore:** When I said infiltrate the foe inner circle, I didn't mean the one he uses when he beds someone…

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><p>Well, here we go.<p>

i'd appreciate reviews


	3. Chapter 3

heya. here is another one. enjoy...

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><p><span>Facebook- wizardry style<span>

**Cho Chang:** What a bitch! I can't believe it! Boyfriend stealing freak!

three people like this

Comments:

**Ginevra Ginny Weasley: **I'm sure Hermione didn't mean it.

**Hermione Granger: **Uh, hello! I'm dating your brother. Are you implying something? Huh?

**Ginevra Ginny Weasley: **Of course not.-laughs nervously- but who else could steal harry from you?

**Draco Lucius Malfoy: **Lol I can't believe that you'd that that mudblood could bag herself a chosen one. –sneer-

**Cho Chang: **Oh my god! It's him. The bitch who stole!

**Hermione Granger: **What do you mean?

**Draco Lucius Malfoy: **The bitch who stole…I like it. Would you terribly mind if I keep it?

**Hermione Granger: **-gasp- I don't want to believe it.

**Draco Lucius Malfoy: **you better.

**Hermione Granger: **will be back. I'm just going to ask harry.

**Draco Lucius Malfoy: **hahahahahahaha. Lmao. The look on Granger's face. Priceless.

**Hermione Granger: **omg. Omg. Omg. Omg. I'm scarred for life...

**Ginevra Ginny Weasley: **What's wrong? What did Harry say?

**Harry James Potter: **Hermione I'm so sorry! I was about to tell you. I didn't want you finding it out like that.- Draco shut up-. Besides, it's not like I knew you were going to walk in on us… but I have to agree, your face was priceless…

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><p>thanks for reading.<p>

i'd appreciate reviews


	4. Chapter 4

Facebook- wizardry style…

**Harry James Potter: **is exhausted.

Ten people like this.

Comments:

**Ron Weasley: **But mate, why are you exhausted? We didn't have quidditch practice…

**Draco Lucius Malfoy: **Its not what exhausted him, Weasley. Its who.

**Ron Weasley:** But he doesn't have a girlfriend.

**Hermione Granger: **Of course he doesn't. Harry's as gay as they come.

**Ron Weasley: **O.o No way! Seriously?

**Harry James Potter: **Are you ok with it?

**Ron Weasley: **As long as your happy, mate. Who is it?

**Harry James Potter: **It's Draco.

**Ron Weasley: **O-o Correct me if I'm wrong but…exhausted and Malfoy…you're not saying what I think your saying r-right?

**Draco Lucius Malfoy: **What? That we had sex? Well then, yes we did. Almost every night too.

**Hermione Granger: **Oh my gosh. I'm so happy for you two! Are you using protection?

**Harry James Potter: **Yeah, we use the tropical ones.

**Hermione Granger: **I hate that. I prefer the mint ones.

**Ron Weasley: **But Hermione… we've never used flavored condoms before…

**Viktor Krum: **;D


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